You can just believe or you can believe and follow. Once you become a believer and make a decision to follow Christ, do you really follow his lead? What keeps you from moving forward? Often, it's actually God who will stop you from moving forward. You may have certain issues in your life aren't dealt with, or that you need to overcome before you can move further in your walk with Him. He'll stop you until it is taken care of. It's kind of like taking midterm exams. Once you pass them, then you can move on to the next chapter. We don't always pass the test on the first try. Sometimes, we need a refresher and need to take the course and exams over to remind us what we've learned.
Currently, one of the issues or chapters I'm working on is boldness. Over the past little over a year I have had people speak into my life and pray prayers of boldness over me. The first person who ever did this was someone I had never met, and my husband hadn't seen or talked to in quite a bit. It was at a church we decided to randomly stop at on our way home from our Honeymoon. This person didn't regularly attend that church either, he too was just passing through. He prayed l would step into the boldness God was calling me too. I thought, "what a scary prayer, why would he pray that? I'm not ready to step into anything. He doesn't know me, I'm not bold."There are no coincidences in God's Kingdom. Another time was at a sort of woman's meeting during praise and worship time. A dear godly woman pulled me aside and told me how God was and is going to move through me and how I needed to step into the boldness He had for me. It was the last thing she ever said to me before she died. Recently, I attended a woman's conference and thought I was going to a breakout session to learn how to pray better, instead I was once again prayed for and the words of encouragement about stepping into boldness spoken over me. What is this God is working out in me? I don't see the big picture yet and as I struggle, sometimes reluctantly, to move forward and follow His lead, even if it means being bold, which for me, is a scary thing to consider.
It wasn't so long ago and quite a few times since, I felt the call to full time ministry, not really knowing what that looks like yet, but knowing it would involve speaking to people, sometimes groups of people. For me, that is terrifying! I keep trying to push the idea away and it keeps returning. While I'm in training for whatever this is going to be, I've had two occasions where I had to stand in front of groups and give talks that included my testimony. I've also very recently been called to pray for others on a prayer team, which means getting up in front of people. These, as I'm coming to realize are small exercises training me for whatever he has in store.
Last Sunday I learned a little lesson about boldness from a young lady, who is quite a bit younger than me. I often see her in church up front freely worshipping God with what appears to be her whole being. She she hears from the Lord, is bold enough to share what what she feels the Lord is telling her, in front of the whole church, and she is just about always dead on. From the perspective of someone who doesn't know her well, it all seems effortless. However, speaking to her, she gets scared and yet she still obeys. She feels that if God gives her something to share, it is needed at that very time and there is a person who needs to hear it. She said that her Grandma told her, "when her feet feel like they are in concrete as she tries to go forward, it is because Satan doesn't want her to." That's when she knows it's from the Lord and she needs to go.
Ya see, that young girl already knows a truth that had escaped me because I am so stuck where Satan wants me, in fear and being over self conscious. She knows she can't let a person miss out on a blessing because of her fear. That's where I need to be, at that level of trust. If I can't give God ALL of my trust, how can I receive all of what He has for me and move forward in the places he wants me to move, and receive blessings He's holding for me. He has a plan, future and hope for me as I have always known to be true. He's holding it out in front of me, but it's up to me to step up and take it.
"And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it—" (Luke 14:27,28)
The cross we are to bear is whatever burden, test, or trial we have set before us. If we aren't willing to bear our own cross, why should we expect God to grant us any hope or future? What does it cost us if we don't step up, move forward, and bear that cross? What are the rewards if we do? Are we willing to miss out?
In reality Jesus already carries the heaviest part of our cross, and will be there helping us as we carry ours. In fact he says in Matthew 11:28-30, Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” I thought of that verse while looking at the shadow in the picture I took over the weekend from my church's Christmas display with live nativity. The shadow in the picture looks like the cross is being held by someone much bigger. Jesus holds up the cross we bear so we aren't overcome by the weight. He's there while we go through the tests, trials, and burdens in life, the ones usually caused by our own making. He's there as we allow him to administer tests in order to move forward. Step up and take what He is offering. I'm working on stepping up into that boldness!
What are you missing out on today because you're afraid to step up and take it?
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