I've had quite a bit rattling around in my head for a while, but not all of it clear. Until now. I've had thoughts about God's timing. As humans we always struggle with the "I want it now syndrome" and questioning God about His actions or what we think is lack of action.
I've really been thinking about family; how it functions, the roles people play, who you consider family, and who you don't. As I often heard it said, family isn't always blood, and that is becoming more and more clear to me. While it is more clear, it makes me very sad and happy; two very extreme emotions! And I don't do emotional, so I thought.
Then, of course it's Christmas time. Why wouldn't I be thinking of Christmas? This year just doesn't feel like Christmas to me. Never thought this Southern California girl would say it, but maybe it's too warm. Maybe, it's our financial situation. However, we've been more blessed than ever!! God's economy is much different than man's, for which I'm grateful. Besides, Christmas isn't about the weather or finances, it's much more. I think part of my lack of Christmas spirit is due to the current condition of our country, our world.
So, with these three topics knocking around inside my head, there is a lot God has laid on my heart about each one. Unpacking them individually has been a task. The question now, do I fit it all into one post, or spread it out into three or more? We'll see how it goes, they do all fit together.
Timing, we all struggle with it. We manage or mismanage it, and often question it. Rarely does it seem perfect. As hard as it is to believe, God's timing is perfect, yet I have questioned it over and over through out my life. Not just out of curiosity either, it's been out of full on rage and anger, and a lot of hurt. As painful as it is at the time, looking back, it's always right timing.
It seemed through out my life I waited for long chunks of time for bad, or for what I perceived as bad situations to change, and questioning why it took so long. I've spent countless hours, days, even years waiting for circumstances or people to change. Some never did, or haven't yet, while some took decades. In my personal life as people know from my first blog post as well as some others, I spent a very long time waiting for men in my life to be who I thought I needed them to be. I waited for an abusive daddy to return home and be a daddy I always wanted and to love me for me, not for what I can do for him. He never came. I waited for the "perfect" man to just love me. He never did, even after 22 years of praying, crying, and trying to be good.
I just wanted to have a Godly husband who I could respect and honor, who treated me with love and kindness, and was the leader of my home. In God's perfect timing, I got just that! In the end, was it worth the 23 year wait? Most definitely! I have never loved or felt so much love for or from another person as I do from my Amazing Man. The love God has for me comes straight through the husband I have now. While I may have felt like an Israelite wandering in the desert during that time of "praying, crying, and trying to be good", at least it wasn't 40 years! God was working on the perfect man for me. He was also working on me, before we could be presented to each other. I just didn't know it. I expected God to change my husband. However, He was changing me and making me into the godly woman my future husband needed. I learned the hard lesson that God could not bless something that was never in His will to begin with; no matter how good I was, how long I waited, cried, begged, prayed, and pleaded.
We were both in relationships where we cried out and prayed to be better people so that our spouses would be better, we just didn't know that our spouses we prayed for would be each other. We wouldn't have worked out if we met any earlier or later. We had to go through what we went through to improve and grow, while others watched the way we handled ourselves, (weather we knew or not at the time) good or bad, in that situation, was a witness for Christ in our lives. While God may not be constrained by time, He works through time. We may be struggling through time, but it's always for His glory! I've gone through an awful lot in the 44 years of my life, a lot of hurt and pain. I've also had a lot of joy that shouldn't be overshadowed by the suffering. Especially when the time of suffering is used for His Glory.
Many may think, that's all well and good. Those are all first world problems, not much compared to what others go through throughout the world. I know, I've thought that, a lot. However, that's where God's time and glory stand out on a much grander scale! As I said before, God isn't constrained by time, but He sure works through it. From the beginning, when sin entered the world man has struggled to see God's perfect timing.
As the death and destruction caused by the sin that tangles God's once perfect world spreads, people are waiting for an end to it all. An end to sadness, pain, and chaos. An end to the death of dreams, relationships, family, and friends. An end to the destruction of values, ideals, faith, and hope. There is a war raging, it's not just the wars we see with our eyes. It's a war in the realm of the unseen. We can all feel it and somewhere deep inside, know it is going to come to an end, we secretly long for the end, some not so secretly. But when? Why is it taking so long for God to bring an end to all the suffering in the world?
It has to be His perfect timing. Just like in my relationship. It couldn't have happened any sooner or later, it just wouldn't have worked. We wouldn't be ready, no matter how much we thought we were ready for the pain to end and something new to begin, it had to be at the right time, God's time. We feel so ready but only God knows when we're really ready.
Remember, the people during the time of Jesus birth were desperately seeking a messiah. It had been about 700 years before Jesus' arrival, that a prediction was made of His coming. Isaiah 9:6 says, "For unto us a Child is born, Unto us a Son is given; And the government will be upon His shoulder. And His name will be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." When He did finally come as announced in Luke 2:11, "For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, which is Christ the Lord", the people were ready for the warrior, not a child or baby. They expected Him to come from the clouds, and fulfill the rest of the prophecy found in Isaiah about the government upon His shoulders. Today, that last part has still, not yet been fulfilled.
Just think, in order for Jesus to come to Earth the first time certain things had to be in place. With the death of Cleopatra and Marc Anthony in 30B.C. just 25 years before Christ, the Roman Empire began its spread. This spread is connected with a decree of Augustus embracing the Greek-Roman world and issuing a census and tax upon the people of the Roman world. This decree caused Joseph and Mary to journey to Bethlehem of Judea, here Jesus, the Messiah was born.
These event were a mark in time, the beginning of fateful, often woeful events that spanned the next seven decades. These events included: The crucifixion of Jesus , the birth of Christianity, and the destruction of the ancient Jewish Kingdom in 70 A.D. by Roman Legions under the command of the Emperor Titus. Jewish people were scattered all over the known world. With the number of Jews in the area reduced, the spread of another great religion was enabled, Islam. These 70 years had a great effect on the rest of time.
The spread of Islam gave way to, The Spanish Inquisition in the 15th Century and the confiscation of Jewish wealth by King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella of Spain. This prepared the way to finance Christopher Columbus and his discovery of America, which further led to England over powering Spain and the British Empire growing. Later the Nazis sought to gain power followed by the Holocaust. The battles through out the centuries have existed between Islam and the other two Abrahamic faiths resulting in the current War on Terror. Still, it's all setting up for a certain time and place, undetermined by all but God. Acts 1:6-7 days, "Therefore, when they had come together, they asked Him, saying, 'Lord, will You at this time restore the kingdom to Israel?' And He said to them, 'It is not for you to know times or seasons which the Father has put in His own authority.'"
Rest assured, there's more to come. In God's perfect time. Are you ready? When that time comes, I pray your hope and future lies in the one true God. Mine does!
...To Be Continued...
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